Facing Separation or Divorce: 10 key considerations to guide you.

The first working Monday of each New Year is often dubbed ‘Divorce Day,’ a term that reflects the
expected surge in divorce inquiries, post-Christmas. While Thackray Williams’ Family team experienced higher call volumes on January 6th , compared to any other day in January; January itself, saw more Family inquiries, than any other month, across 2024.


Divorce is rarely a sudden decision, triggered by a single event. Individuals contemplate separation
carefully, choosing to delay discussions, until after the festive season, and children have returned to
school. So, whether you’re considering a separation or divorce, or you’ve taken that initial step, here’s our top 10 things to think about:

  1. Hopeful of reconciliation? Perhaps consider marriage counselling. Relate could help.
  2. If reconciliation isn’t feasible, start planning for your separation. Consider your goals for yourself, your partner, and your children. What do you see for the future?
  3. Gather financial information including property valuations, mortgage statements, savings, investments, credits cards, loans and income. Your solicitor can obtain your partners financial information.
  4. Don’t overlook Pensions, obtain a valuation from your pension provider. This valuation, often called a ‘transfer value’ or ‘cash equivalent value’ (CEV), is crucial to secure a fair settlement.
  5. List out your monthly expenses including mortgage/rent, utility bills, loans and school/nursery/childcare costs.
  6. Research your lawyers, whilst some law firms offer free initial consultations, these are typically
    short. For a comprehensive discussion, consider a ‘fixed price’ consultation. This allows a thorough review of your situation, providing you with the necessary time and guidance to make informed decisions.
  7. It’s crucial to feel comfortable with your chosen solicitor. If you don’t connect with the first solicitor you speak to, don’t hesitate to seek a second. Finding a solicitor you trust, and understand, is essential, for a positive experience.
  8. Discuss your budget. Family lawyers will help in any way they can, offering flexible arrangements when possible. Lawyers typically charge hourly rates, based on their experience.
    Discuss fees and choose a solicitor, who best suits your needs and budget.
  9. Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) offers a way to resolve family issues outside of Court. By
    choosing ADR, you may save time and money while encouraging a more amicable resolution.
    This is particularly important when children are involved. ADR can be effectively used to
    address divorce, financial settlements, and child-related arrangements. ADR is not appropriate
    in all cases. It’s also possible to contact a Mediator directly (Family mediation | Resolution and
    Home – Family Mediation Council)
  10. When conducting online research, rely on reputable sources. Remember that each family, and
    divorce situation, is unique. For further information, explore these recommended websites
    a. Divorce and separation | Advicenow
    b. Supporting your child through divorce and separation | Cafcass
    c. Home – Women’s Aid

If you have questions relating to this article, or would like to explore your current situation with us,
please email our family partners:
Stuart Ruff stuart.ruff@thackraywilliams.com or Caroline Burstein caroline.burstein@thackraywilliams.com

Helen Loder
Author: Helen Loder

Co-Director of Sevenoaks Mums